Rabbi Harold Kushner on faith, mistakes and why Eve is actually the hero

'Nine Essential Things I've Learned About Life'
'Nine Essential Things I've Learned About Life' by Harold Kushner
Courtesy of Knopf

Rabbi Harold Kushner wrote the book on bad things happening. Literally.

He wrote "When Bad Things Happen to Good People" in 1978, and it went on to sell more than four million copies.

Kushner is back now with more wisdom, in "Nine Essential Things I've Learned About Life."

He joined MPR News' Kerri Miller to talk about his new book, the benefit of making mistakes and the power of forgiveness.

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On his biggest mistake

"The biggest mistake I made, looking back on my more than 50 years as a rabbi, is that I came to the job with a very traditional view of God — that God is in charge of everything and if something bad happens, it's either because we didn't understand it, or because in time, we'll see why God felt it was the right thing to do," Kushner said.

"I had to let go of that."

The moment he realized this came when he went to comfort a woman who had just lost her young husband. The first thing she said to him was: "Why would God let this happen to such a good person?"

Kushner launched into a complicated, theological answer — and then realized his mistake.

"She didn't need theology, she needed a hug," he said. "I could hold her hand, and not try to explain everything, not to try to convince her that what happened to her husband and the father of her children was the right thing to happen. All of a sudden, religion was able to be a source of comfort and not a source of anguish."

On the value of prayer

Several years ago, researchers conducted a study on the healing power of prayer. They selected a cohort of individuals recovering from surgery and divided them into three groups.

The first group had people praying for them, and they knew it; the second group had people praying for them, but did not know it; and the third group had no one praying for them. The result: There was no difference between the groups.

In an interview after the results were released, a journalist asked Kushner if this proved that prayer was a waste of time.

"I said no, it doesn't prove a thing," Kushner said.

"It's not God's job to make sick people feel better — that's the doctor's job. It's God's job to make sick people brave, and in my experience, he does that wonderfully."

On Adam and Eve — and why everyone has the story wrong

For 2,000 years, Kushner said, Jews and Christians alike have gotten the Garden of Eden story wrong. The story has been taught, he said, "in such a way that Eve comes across a villain. ... If you read it as it was intended to be read, Eve is the heroine of the story. She is the first human being to bravely step across the line that separates humans from other creatures, thereby gaining knowledge of good and evil."

The story's incorrect interpretation "denigrates women unfairly, and we've had to work very hard to carve out a place for women in organized religion," Kushner said. "We're finally doing it, but we had to waste a lot of effort to get there."