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When I began my professional career in the entertainment industry 15 years ago, I was an actress. I was a very young actress with a fledgling career, but I was an actress nonetheless. I understood that it was possibly the most frustrating, exhausting and confidence-rattling industry in the world today, but despite it all, I was an actress, and I was proud. And now?


I continue to be proud. But now, they call me an actor.


What happened? How is it that I was once an actress, but have now become an actor? There have been no changes in my anatomy --- I would have noticed. Nor have I changed what I do, though I hope I've gotten better at it. 


Yet at some point over the past couple of years I became an actor. And it isn't just me; all the other actresses I know became actors, too. In fact, there are a number of professions that have adopted this all-male-gendered attitude (like the food industry and the airlines). I fear that in 10 years, we'll have done away with gendered titles altogether.


Why does this bother me so much? Because I'm a girl! I like being an actress not only because I love what I do, but because it sounds pretty and girly. An actor ... that sounds like a dude. Because it is. 


And I can already hear the feminist battle cries, so listen: I am all for equality --  I can do my job just as well as any man can do his, and vice versa. But we're still different.  Shouldn't the difference be celebrated? Isn't that really what we're into these days -- celebrating how wonderfully different we all are? 


This idea is illustrated perfectly in one of my favorite books, 

 by Madeleine L'Engle. It's technically a children's book, but if you've somehow made it to adulthood without having read it, check it out. One of the most pronounced ways in which L'Engle describes pure evil is a world where everything is exactly the same. Everything. Everyone lives in identical neighborhoods, on identical streets, in identical houses  --  the children bounce their balls outside at exactly the same time in the exact same rhythm. There are no differences;  everything is exactly the same.


Now, I'm not saying that this whole turning-actresses-into-actors thing is pure evil; that would be an exaggeration. I just don't like it --- especially in my industry, because a large part of our storytelling is performed in an effort to get people who are different to accept and embrace and understand each other. Why, then, should I take on a male title when I am not a man? When someone calls me an actor, it feels forced and unnatural. Actors and actresses are equal, but they're not the same, and I don't want them to be.


That said, we do have a few things in common: Whether you're an actor or an actress, this industry is a beast, and we've all gone through the same ups and downs. Even though I love what I do, I've been beat up, kicked around, picked up, dropped again; I've soared and I've fallen down --- but through it all, I've always been an actress, and proud of it. No matter what level, what I've been looking for or what I've found, whether I'm on a project or on hiatus, I've always known that I'm an actress. And I refuse to yield to the idea that equality means we're all the same. 


Sara Marsh, Minneapolis, is an actress and writer.

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Being in favor of equality doesn't mean we have to blind ourselves to differences.

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