Who will defend Pythagoras from ranting ESPN blowhard?

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It's 2017 and old sportswriters and sports broadcasters are still railing against mathematics in sports.
ESPN New York's Don La Greca, who did not major in math science in college, had just about enough this week when someone tried to analyze the New York Giants offensive line in a fashion that didn't include the word "sucks" as a formula's integer.
On the subject of football, nobody expects much from the analysis.
But when he strayed out of his league and into baseball analytics, geometry became the victim of a brutal drive-by.
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His now viral rant won plenty of support.
Math is ruining sports, man.
Who will speak for the Pythagorean Theorem, which, for the record, has no application when evaluating football?
(h/t: Paul Tosto)